Thursday, January 7, 2010

Story about the Stupid Human


Every once in a while, my stupid human does what she does best, something really stupid.  Tonight was a peak performance of ignorance and entertainment for me and Beady Eyes.  It started something like this...

It supposedly "snowed" today which means the clouds gathered, the people rushed to purchase all the available milk and bread, the schools closed, and the human placed sweaters on me, Beady Eyes, and Princess Geritol. I, of course, had the cute one with stripes and an adjustable scarf to cover my extra fluffy neck.  Beady Eyes is wearing her "Army" looking jacket, which is ironic because if I were at war, she would be the last thing I would feel threatened by (except around my food dish), and Princess Geritol was rocking her Old Navy Fleece lined vest.

Human was packing up stuff to go party up the street while she watched something that takes attention away from me. I walked by the back door for a simple cruise-by, no biggie, I didn't need to go, I just wanted to check things out. Human walks behind me.

Human goes weird on me and opens the door, walks out to the deck, leans down to pick up what she thinks is Beady Eyes when all of a sudden, I hear stupid human freaking out, holding her chest, backing up to the house. She looked crazed!  It was then I realized what she thought was Beady Eyes was really my resident BFF...

The freaky BFF did what it does best, played DEAD. Then once it got the chance, it scurried away from the stupid human who was obviously having a cardiac "issue".

Yep, the stupid human thought poor Beady Eyes was on the back deck by herself without her jacket and she tried to pick her up.  If that was not quality entertainment, then I'm not a Basket Hound.  Beady Eyes was resting comfortably on the sofa watching this whole ordeal. I gotta hand it to the Beady Eyed One, for just a moment, I felt a real bonding as we both laughed at the stupid human.

If I could get pay per view stupid human network, I would so pawn my multi-colored collar for it.