Last night I got bored. It was 3:00am and everyone was asleep. I tried the usual: jumping on the human's heads, knocking the trash can over, standing in the bathtub howling, and dragging my softie bone around-squeeker going full blown. But no, they would not budge. I think the female took her Melatonin, the old man human sleeps through earthquakes, and the little humans were out. I even considered taking a BIG shit in the hallway just for the smell effect, but last time I did that, Mama Human almost had a come apart and steam cleaned the hallway with enough Clorox and Cleaner to make us ALL vacate the house for three hours.
So, I just jumped on the bed and tried snoring as loud as I could. Me and the Old Man had a snore off. We sounded like a Sleep Apnea clinic with bunch of chronic pulmonary diseased old farts being tested at once. Mama Human was not amused. But because I am the cutest of the two, she kicked the old man outta bed which led to my being able to go outside because once he was up, he had nothing else better to do. Then after my usual 15 minute Sonnet to the Moon, I came in, bypassed the Old Man on the sofa, and went straight to the Master bed where I slept comfortably on MY side of the bed, with MY pillow, next to MY Mama Human.
Yes, indeed, I had a howling good time.
Damn, I am smart.